Moving away from your partner and starting a long-distance relationship can be tough. Or maybe you’ve met someone unforgettable on a trip away and despite the distance, can’t resist starting something new.
You may be thinking that the distance could ‘make or break’ your relationship, or you might have others telling you that it won’t work, but this isn’t always the case – if you care about each other it’s worth making the effort.
It doesn’t have to be all sad face emojis and I miss yous either, there are some good things about long distance relationships too, like the build-up to a date night on Skype or the excitement when you know you’re finally going to get to see your partner.
After all, absence makes the heart grow fonder, right?
Here are some tips on how to make a long-distance relationship work.
Take time to stay connected
Thanks to technology, there are loads of ways to keep connected. Gone are the days of writing letters and waiting days to receive a reply, we now have texting, phone calls, video and Facetime – there are so many easy and convenient ways to stay in touch.
Keeping the communication flowing is important – if you don’t make the effort to keep in contact, it’s more likely that you’ll lose touch and the feelings will fade. Try to send a text first thing in the morning or last thing at night – there’s no better start to the day than waking up to a funny good morning GIF and knowing that your partner is thinking about you.
Sticking to a regular time for a daily call works well for some long-distance lovers but others might prefer things to be more relaxed – you don’t want keeping your relationship going to start feeling like a chore. Once you get into the flow of things, you’ll soon find out what works best for the two of you.
Commitment, trust and honesty
It’s a no-brainer that staying committed to each other is important. Whether you’re exclusive or you’ve decided to try an open relationship, it’s important to honour what you’ve agreed on.
For your long-distance relationship to work, you need to be able to trust each other. Don’t sit at home worrying about what your partner is doing, constantly bugging them or not giving them enough space, and don’t jump to conclusions. On the other hand, if know that your partner is feeling insecure, make the effort to reassure them and tell them how important they are to you.
What if how you feel changes? Honesty is always the best policy. Telling the truth may not be easy at the time but it’s the best option in the long run. If you lie to your partner and the truth comes out further along the line, it will be worse for the both of you.
Plan ahead and stay positive
Make sure you plan when you’re next going to see each other, too – planning the next trip will give you both something to look forward to and keep the vibe positive. When living apart from each other, it’s always good to have something to be excited about. Start organising next year’s holiday, birthday celebrations, or a dirty weekend break.
Are you planning on moving to be together after a set period of time?
Looking to the future and deciding on your next big step will help to keep things in perspective when being apart from each other feels hard and will give you both a goal to work towards.
Phone sex goals
Whether it’s sexting, sharing your most intimate desires over the phone or setting up a video date, just because you’re not physically together it doesn’t mean the sexual element of your connection has to fade.
Sex isn’t just a physical need, it’s an emotional one too. Staying physically intimate whilst in a long-distance relationship can be challenging, but staying connected doesn’t have to be.
If you struggle with sexting, these sexting tips might up your confidence. And remember, including a few sexy photos never hurts…
Phone sex is a great way to enjoy each other from afar. Hearing your partner moan with pleasure over your words is something super-hot that you wouldn’t get to experience if you were in the same location. Or if you are feeling even more excited, try a video call where you can view each other’s faces and bodies as you enjoy the moment.
To get in the mood, choose a time when you’ll both be free from distractions and create an atmosphere that you feel relaxed in – think candles, music, whatever works – this is your time for pleasure after all.
Have confidence and be flexible
To follow the above points, you must have confidence in yourself and your relationship. Having a lack of confidence in your relationship or your partner can lead to excessive calls and texts for the wrong reasons, incorrect assumptions and unnecessary tension between you both, which will only drive you apart.
Try not to get too sensitive if your partner postpones your call because they have plans. Long distance is only going to work if you’re both understanding of the fact that you’re trying to lead your lives and being in different places and time zones means that sometimes your plans won’t be in sync.
If you’re feeling worried then talk to your partner and express your feelings, they’re there to listen to you and re-assure you. You may struggle at first, as you’re both coming to terms with this change in your lives, but once the confidence kicks in, you’ll feel secure again and everything else will flow naturally.